Who knew
by The Blonde Haired Goose
Summary: Maybe spoilers for 4x04. Kurt is back at McKinley after the break-up, and he sings out his feelings.


Kurt takes a deep breath and looks out at the empty auditorium, before he opens his mouth and starts singing, bright and hurtful memories flashing in front of his eyes.

**You took my hand, you showed me how  
You promised me you'd be around  
Uh huh, that's right**

**I took your words and I believed  
In everything you said to me  
Yeah huh, that's right**

"_You move me, Kurt." Lips touching, teeth clashing together, a flutter in his chest. He can't believe this is finally happening._

**If someone said three years from now  
You'd be long gone  
I'd stand up and punch them out  
Cause they're all wrong**

**I know better  
Cause you said forever  
And ever, who knew?**

"_I'm sorry Kurt, I just can't do this anymore." No. Why is this happening. "Stop, stop, stop." Suddenly, Kurt is running. Away from Blaine, from his words, from what they mean. _

**Remember when we were such fools  
And so convinced and just too cool  
Oh no, no no**

**I wish I could touch you again  
I wish I could still call you a friend  
I'd give anything**

"_Hi," says Blaine quietly. He hadn't expected this. He couldn't meet Blaine now. Not like this. He wasn't prepared. He wasn't ready. "Hi."_

**When someone said count your blessings now  
For their long gone  
I guess I just didn't know how  
I was all wrong**

"_You are the love of my life, Kurt."_

**But they knew better  
Still you said forever and ever  
Who knew? Yeah yeah  
I'll keep you locked in my head  
Until we meet again  
Until we, until we meet again  
And I won't forget you my friend  
What happened?**

"_You can't be here anymore, Kurt." "I get it, I know, I'm pathetic." Kurt looks down at his hands. He doesn't want to hear this. "No, no, no, Kurt. You're not pathetic, it's just that you're stuck. You don't belong here anymore, you belong in New York."_

_New York. Where it had all ended._

**If someone said three years from now  
You'd be long gone  
I'd stand up and punch them out  
Cause they're all wrong**

**And that last kiss I'll cherish  
Until we meet again  
And time makes it harder  
I wish I could remember  
But I keep your memory  
You visit me in my sleep  
My darling, who knew?**

"_Blaine. Blaine!" Kurt cries out, trashing around. Soft lips. That's all he remembers when Rachel comes running into his room to wake him up. "Kurt, are you okay?" He's shivering. He's cold, so incredibly cold. He can't shake the memory of the soft lips, and his hand brushes lightly over his own. _

**My darling  
My darling, who knew?  
My darling I miss you  
My darling, who knew?**

**Who knew?**

He doesn't realize there are tears on his face until he's finished the song, sniffling quietly. He doesn't know why he's here. He doesn't know why he let Rachel drag him back here to watch that stupid play. He doesn't know why he didn't just go home afterwards. He doesn't know why he's standing here, on this stage, singing his heart out when he knows it won't change anything.

"Kurt?" calls a soft voice, making him jump as he turns around. Blaine. There he is. Tears are still running down his face but he doesn't care. "Blaine." The word is barely a whisper, but Blaine hears him, stepping forwards into the light. He looks stunning, as always.

"Are you okay?" he asks softly, and it makes Kurt want to throw up and rage at the same time. "Okay? Does it look like I'm okay, Blaine? Does it really look like I've been okay ever since _that night_?" he doesn't remember deciding to shout the words, but apparently he did just that, because he can see Blaine flinching slightly.

"I'm sorry, but I couldn't keep holding you back." It's the same words. The same words he said that night. The same words he's been repeating to himself all this time.

"Can't you get it through your thick head? You weren't holding me back! You were keeping me sane. You were what kept me from going crazy. Even with Rachel there with me I was terrified of my dreams never coming through. Of having to go back to Lima and spend the rest of my life working at the Lima Bean. You were what made my dreams seem possible. And then you just left me there, alone. How do you think that made me feel?"

The silence that comes when Kurt has finished shouting is deafening. His quick breath is all he can hear now, and it takes him a minute to register that Blaine is speaking. "I know I screwed up." His eyes are closed shut, but Kurt can see tiny tears forming in the corners.

He takes a step towards Blaine, as quietly as he can so as to not let him know what he's doing. "I'm sorry, but it was just too much for me to handle. The insecurity, the loneliness. I couldn't stand it anymore. I didn't think. I just acted. And then it was too late." Kurt inches his way towards Blaine, very slowly.

"I still love you Kurt, and I want us to be together, if you'll give me another chance." Blaine opens his eyes when Kurt is just inches from his face, and before he can jump away in shock Kurt's hands are at the back of his head, pressing their lips together. They are just as soft as he remembers. Just like in the dream. Kurt doesn't know how long they stay there, but eventually they break apart, both breathing heavily and staring deeply into each other's eyes.

"So you'll forgive me?" Kurt shakes his head slowly. "We still need to talk about this, but for now, I just want to stay here, with you." Pressing his lips against Blaine's once more. He finally feels okay again. He's finally whole.


End file.
